vrijdag 17 september 2010
recently, when i practiced answering really honestly on the imaginary solicitation conversation, I figured the weaknesses in my 'personality' might as well be my strenghts: bad memory, whole lots of fantasy. now lets project that thought 'what's bad is good' on conversations about on 'body material': it's all in our head.
First: When you think the head-talk isn't true and you do believe in the existance of vast 'society standards' for ideal body shapes/weight? They mainly come out of some kind of a collective head. Seriously, nobody can really put those in vast rules. They're in a constant state of change and movement, like brains.
the basic idea behind this way of thinking is that you can never really change your body shape, ergo wasting thoughts on how to do that is ridiculous. actual attemps to change it are one degree less ridiculous...
...but acceptance of the 'bad' is the only thing in life that's not ridiculous, i'm guessing that's why acceptance is a 'grown up' trm. but that's not true either. do you remember the time when we were kids? we didn't give a single damn about our bodies. we just accepted it. we'd just grab the cool stuff out of our mommies' closets and dress up, unaware of any known standard and relying on all of our creativity and fantasy. without even thínking about what's going to flatter our body shape, not to mention thinking about sizes. (we knew it back then and we remember it now: oversized is the rule for cool.) That's the good side. The dark side is we tend to forget this and our fantasies are working overtime, criticizing ourselves.
What does your body remember?
a good memory,
still cries at a good film,
still kisses with saliva,
no longer empty and frantic
like a cat
tied to a stick,
that's driven into
frozen winter shit
(the ability to laugh at weakness)
-radiohead, ok computer, song 'fitter happier'